Posts Tagged With: Faith

The Attic

It was our second last day in the Netherlands. We had been visiting family and driving around favourite and previously undiscovered attractions for two weeks. There was still one final visit – my last surviving aunty in Holland who had been married to my mother’s youngest brother.

My wife and I received an enthusiastic welcome. A cousin and her husband were also present and later a grandson arrived. After the pleasantries, coffee and cake there was a surprise, a box of books, letters, photos and other memorabilia that had been discovered in the house, that many years earlier, had been where my grandparents lived.

The story is amazing! The grandson (about 27) had been showing some relatives (two girls their 20s) around Rotterdam when they asked if they could see the place where their grandfather (my uncle) had been born. When they arrived, the grandson, being polite, knocked on the door of the house and asked the owner if minded if he took some photos of the girls in front of the house. “Not at all,” was the reply, “But maybe you can tell me if a box of material I found in the attic belongs to your family. I was about to take it to the Rotterdam archives.”

So, this is how these 80 to 90 year old treasures came back to the family. There was a wedding photo of my grandparents which included many other family members, letters from a nephew who was in a Spitfire squadron in Indonesia during the uprising in the late 1940s, pension slips, post cards, school books, books that had been presented by church and school to my aunts and uncles, and my favourite, a certificate belonging to my mother for completing her primary education at the “School met den Bijbel”.

This is particularly special because I have been involved in Christian Education in Australia all my adult life, as a parent, school board member, teacher, and now, grandparent. This certificate puts into perspective a history of family involvement in Christian Education. Even today, two of my daughters teach in Christian schools.

Psalm 78 speaks of telling our children God’s statutes, and “even the children yet to be born.” (v6) My mother as a 13-year-old had no idea of what the future would bring. There would be war and migration, but there were also children, grand children and great grandchildren who know God because God’s truth had been passed through the generations.

Driving away from my auntie that night, I had tears in my eyes and reflected how God’s Covenant promises work through generations; one generation passing on the truth to the next. This certificate also signifies the end of my mother’s formal education. She had to go to work to support her family in the years between the depression and the war. More importantly, it is a reminder to me of how faithful grandparents sent their daughter to a school that would support them in their parental task and, generations later, the impact is still felt.

Categories: christian education, Faith, Family | Tags: , , , , | 4 Comments

Faith in the West

There are times, many times, when I become despondent about the Christian faith in the west.  From its “me” centred  individualism and rampant selfish lifestyle, to glib culturally hip media presentations replacing authentic worship, and onto its lack of cutting edge into the 21stC mindset, there is much to depress me.

On Sunday we had a breath of life. A glimpse of the past and a possibility for the future. We attended a Lutheran church in Brønnøysund on the west coast of Norway – exactly halfway between the north and south. It was Palm Sunday and the children were incorporated into the service with palm branches. They presented the congregation with songs they had learnt for the occasion. There was also a baptism. Both mother and baby were dressed in traditional costumes. The church was full and there was a clear “buzz” of joy in the congregation. There was not a data projector to be seen. Psalters were handed out. Grandchildren hugged grandparents, friends greeted each other warmly and overall, there was a warm conviviality. It was clear that Jesus was present in the songs, words and attitudes.

It was an environment that a neighbour could be invited to. When an old man using a walker came in, a person vacated their seat, another got a cushion and a still another made sure he sat down safely. “Pastoral” care was obvious.

What have we lost with the obsession for mega churches, CEO’s and business teams running churches with smooth efficiency and ice cold hearts. It is difficult in these environments to share the highs and lows of life’s journeys and to celebrate and grieve together as the family we should be.

Am I just being a grumpy old man, or have we lost something, something precious, in our modern worship practices?

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Bullies and the Anti-Bully

A friend said to me recently, “you seem to be angry all the time.” He was expressing a concern for my welfare. I acknowledged that he was right. I do have a sense of anger mixed with a large dose of sadness. An acquaintance is being bullied by the elders in her church, the leader of the world’s most powerful nation leads in a way that comes from the classic bully’s handbook. Much of our social discourse is carried on in the language of put downs, abuse, ridicule, mockery and threats – the language of the bully. Examples being given by some leaders suggests to the population as a whole, and our young in particular, that this is an appropriate way to behave.

Bullies use their strength, power, authority and influence to ensure that they get their own way. They are usually supported by a body of sycophants who bow and scrape at the bully‘s commands and do anything to be accepted.

My trust and hope lies in the word that tells me the “meek shall inherit the earth” (Matt 5:5) and the “first shall be last” (Matt 20:16).

The gospel is the ultimate irony. The example of Christ is the complete opposite of that carried on by bullies. He is the anti-bully. He put aside his position as God to become one of us. He served instead of demanding, healed instead of breaking, embraced instead of shunning. Finally he gave his life for others. 

This is not just an example, it is a counter cultural way of life – a counter intuitive existence. 

For Christ followers it is a challenge. I am angry! But Christ calls for a different response to the path that, innately, I want to take.

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Parenting Children for a Life of Faith – Helping Children meet and know God: Rachel Turner, a review

Parenting Children for a Life of Faith – Helping Children meet and know God: Rachel Turner. Bible Reading Fellowship 2018

I am always on the lookout for resources to assist Christian parents in the amazing but terrifying task of discipling their children in faith. The good news is that I have come across two related resources which I can heartily recommend. One is a book and the second is a video series. My strongest encouragement is to get involved with both, but I know (as an ex-English teacher) that there are reluctant readers out there in parent land, so the video series is a minimum!

The Book:

Parenting Children for a life of Faith by Rachel Turner. (This is available from Koorong and Book Depository in an omnibus edition which includes Parenting Children for a Life of Purpose & Parenting Children for a Life of Confidence – (I haven’t yet completely read the latter two).

The Book: Parenting Children for a Life of Faith has the by-line “Helping children meet and know God.” The book includes chapters on modelling a relationship with God and countering wrong views of God. The chapter “Chatting with God” deals with the idea that our relationship is not just meant for set times of reading the Bible or devotions but is an all of life activity. I found this chapter particularly helpful although I would have liked to see a greater emphasis on Bible reading with regard to “hearing” from God. With that quibble aside it is very encouraging. There is also a separate chapter on more “formal” prayer. Another chapter that was very helpful was entitled “Surfing the waves” which is about making the most, as a parent, of the opportunities that arise in the ebb and flow of your child’s spiritual growth.

Other chapters include “Helping children engage with church” and “Starting well with under-fives.”

In part 2 of the omnibus she has a chapter on telling your children the whole gospel story from a young age. She adds examples as to how this can work. This, she suggests, helps children to make sense of the world and its brokenness from a young age. This important idea deserves an article/review just on its own as I found it a good antidote to the, often piecemeal, manner in which the gospel is presented to children.

Overall, I found the content to be practical and Biblical with an abundance of helpful examples. It is a book I wish I had had when I was a younger parent.

The Parenting for Faith Video Course

Rachel Turner also presents a (free) 8 part video course on the same topic. https://www.parentingforfaith.brf.org.uk/ For a sober lad like me her exuberance is sometimes overwhelming, however, putting that aside it is a very valuable resource. There are also downloadable handbooks available to lead you through the course. It is the type of course where it would be very valuable to meet with a few like minded parents and do it together over 8 weeks.

In an era where there are so many “attractions” vying for the heart of your child, here is a book and a video course which can develop your parenting skills in that crucial and eternally relevant arena of faith development. Parents of faith want their children to engage in a life under the Kingship of Jesus from the earliest possible moment.

Pieter Stok

Categories: Child Theology, Children, christian, christian education, Church, Faith, Family | Tags: , , , | Leave a comment

One Generation

A while back, my wife wrote a post that has continued to haunt us both – One generation from extinction. It speaks of the urgency of training and nurturing our children in faith – particularly in a post Christian world.

To this end, I am in the process of setting up a website/blog that collects and distributes resources that will enable parents and churches find material that will assist them in this crucial task. I would love to hear of books, websites and articles that have assisted you. Join us at Familyfaith.blog.

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Internet Worship – Observations

During “lockdown” my wife and I attended a variety of church services around the globe via the internet. For example, we valiantly slogged through 1&2 Samuel with Alistair Begg. Since then, we have regularly visited churches to explore how the family of God is worshipping Him. It is encouraging to see people continuing to encounter and praise God, and give thanks for His son 2000 years after his death and resurrection. There is much to be thankful for.

Saint Pierre Cathedral, Geneva

However, there are a few reflections I wish to make:

It surprises me that many worship services do not have an obvious “Call to Worship” – the idea that it is God who calls his children to gather. A Call to Worship reminds His children that they are responding faithfully to their God and that He is the centre and focus of worship. We are giving Him the “Worth” (from the old English worth-ship) he is due. He commences a dialogue to which we respond with hymns of praise and confession, and prayer. However, too often I see services that commence with “I” songs – songs about our experience and feelings.  These are appropriate in the right place, but they don’t clearly focus our attention upon God. Even the corporate “we” is often missing – the songs indicate a lot of individuals in one place, rather than the family of God.

Another observation is that most services have difficulty incorporating children. Family worship is, if we are truthful, adult worship with a few poorly timed nods at the children, at best. Often, the children are disregarded altogether. All age family worship which includes the sermon, is a hill too high to climb for the vast majority of churches. Children are often hived off to “age appropriate” worship. That children should be taught is not the issue. If worship is the gathering of God’s family before God, then children should be included and involved too. Age and maturity appropriate teaching can occur at other times for every age in the congregation in whatever way you want to dice and slice the congregation.

My third observation is there is often an emphasis on personal salvation but not the Kingdom of God. There is little emphasis on proclaiming, revealing, living in and expecting the Kingdom. The “already” (revealed in Christ)  and “not yet” (not fully realised until his return)  Kingdom seems sadly irrelevant to most preachers. The reason this bothers me is that a lack of Kingdom preaching empowers a continued dualism in Christians. Life is divided between the religious and the secular and we are subtly encouraged to live this schizophrenic life.

If you have encountered churches where these issues have been addressed, I would love to hear about them and “visit” them.

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“I think women are foolish to pretend they are equal to men. “

“I think women are foolish to pretend they are equal to men. They are far superior and always have been.” William Golding (author of Lord of the Flies.)

A few days ago I posted the above quote on my Facebook page as whimsical nudge at some men who lord their ‘superiority’ over women. As a father of 6 intelligent women of whom 4 are contently unmarried, and the husband of one strong wife, I have learned to see life from a different perspective. As one who was once considered a male chauvinist by his fellow high school students many years ago, I have had a long learning journey.

Conservative churches often highlight the role of the stay-at-home mum caring lovingly for her children and supporting her husband. That is what my wife did in our family, as well as volunteering in arrange of organisations, from church ministries to toy libraries with time that was left over. She strongly believed that was her calling.  I hasten to add that there are many women who would like to do that, but economic necessity has made it more difficult.

But conservative churches haven’t been good at celebrating singleness – particularly single women. The apostle Paul writes about it very approvingly in 1 Corinthians 7. Singleness is a gift that can be used in our Kingdom mission. It enables a focus on God’s calling. However, churches have often found it hard to work with this ‘celebration of singleness’. Male dominated church councils have kept women at arm’s length and have seldom created or developed positions that these women could fill.

My daughters all love and serve the Lord and his kingdom but none do it in the denomination they grew up in. One has been an elder, another is a deacon, still another is committed to Christian education but all this outside their denomination of birth. This is both a cause for happiness and sadness. Happiness because they are serving God, sadness because the church that baptised them has no real place for them.

Yes, we all have equal value in the eyes of God but women who have sought to live by Biblical values and not feminist tropes have had to have a higher standard of grace to withstand apathy and rejection.

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Children in the Church – specifically worship

A few Sundays ago I was sitting in church counting the number of children aged under 14. The conclusion was, in my estimation, that about half the congregation on that Sunday were in that age bracket. A church with so many children is truly blessed. Sadly, the astounding thing was that at no point during the service were they acknowledged, whether in the language and illustrations of the sermon, in the liturgy, in the choice of songs, in the prayers – nowhere was there a place for their young voices, hearts and minds to be included in the worship of God. The adults were acknowledged through all those activities – but the children weren’t. It was as if they didn’t exist.

Sunday worship is to bring communal praise and glory to God, and I would humbly suggest that God desires the worship of children and infants as much as he does of adults. It could be argued that their worship is even more important. Psalm 8:2 declares, “From the lips of children and infants you have ordained praise.” It follows that those who lead worship have the responsibility and privilege to enable and empower the worship of children as well. This, I would have thought, should be even more clearly seen in a Covenant community where we acknowledge God’s goodness from one generation to the next.

Some argue that we have children’s Sunday School for that purpose. No doubt, worship occurs there too, but it isn’t the whole community of God coming as one family before Him.

There is a more critical reason to reflect on this. Children need to grow in the wonderful idea that they are part of the family of God and that they are important to God. Too many young people leave the church in their teenage or university years believing that there is no real place for them in church. Including and involving them in worship is one central way to make that leaving more unlikely. Why would one leave a family in which one’s involvement and membership is key to its purpose and function?

To have worship that includes all ages may be difficult and challenging but this is no reason to push it aside. It is a reason to sit down and work together to find rich and genuine ways in which all God’s children, young and old, fit and frail, men and women have a voice in the praise of their God – together.

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Still Valuable

The New Conspirators by Tom Sine came out 15 years ago. Its is still a valuable message for our age. Below is my review from 12 Years ago.

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Parenting

Below is an article on parenting that I wrote many years ago … it is still relevant

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