A Skyped voice,
An Apple Message,
An Instagram photo
or even
a good old email,
is no replacement
for eyes meeting,
a tender touch
and a warm hug.
Posts Tagged With: family
A Skyped Voice
Categories: Poem, poetry, Reflections, Uncategorized
Tags: family, Marriage, Poem, poems, poetry
6 Comments
Children and Church – Thank You, but More Please!
I must extend a big thank you to all of you who have responded to my request for childhood memories of church. (The original post here which includes an email address). One thing your responses have already done is widen my thinking and planning. I have received some emails regarding various kinds abuse upon which I have to reflect deeply. Some of you have commented on excitement and others sheer boredom. Overall, however, I get the strong impression that for many, if not most, children were incidental to church life. This collection has only just begun so I continue to encourage readers to comment and to ask friends to comment
Please keep your memories and reflections coming.
Categories: Bible, Child Theology, Children, christian, Church, Uncategorized
Tags: Christian, Christianity, Church, Faith, family
2 Comments
Your Experience of Church as a Child
I need your feedback!
I am asking readers to recall their experience of church and worship as a child. What did you connect with, what alienated you, what activities enabled you to enjoy the community of church – in all I want to hear about the good, bad and ugly. Your memories and experiences, anecdotes and stories is what I am after.
Currently I am researching material for a book I hope to write on “children and church” and your experiences will help fill out the picture
Please email me at pstok@iinet.net.au or add your comments below.
Fellow bloggers may I please encourage you to reblog this request so that your blog readers have an opportunity to respond as well. The greater the cultural variety the better the picture I can gather.
Thank you in anticipation.
Pieter
Categories: Child Theology, Children, Church, community, Faith, Family
Tags: children, Christian, Christianity, Church, Faith, family
20 Comments
“Let the little children … “
But Jesus called the children to him and said, ‘Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Luke 18:16
It strikes me me time and again how worship, that is, the average worship service, is largely an adult activity. There maybe a children’s talk, which in my experience is usually too abstract or allegorical for younger children to grasp and there maybe a children’s song, but for 95% of the service, or more, children are ignored or excluded.
To solve this problem churches often hive the children off to a separate room at some point. This usually comes as relief to both child and parent.
My question: What are some of the success stories out there where children have been genuinely incorporated into all age worship? That is, where has the family of God been truly visible in worship – and not just the older members?
If you have witnessed Biblical, successful strategies I would love to hear about them. Jesus’ injunction above is far too important to ignore.
Categories: Child Theology, Children, christian, Christianity, Church, Faith, Family
Tags: children, Christian, Christianity, Church, Faith, family
2 Comments
Children as Spiritual Champions – Part 1
The first book I am re-reading as I immerse myself in the topic of “children and church” is George Barna’s very personal confession and realisation, “Transforming Children into Spiritual Champions” (Regal 2003). In this book he acknowledges his own blindness, and suggests that this is modelled by the church at large – especially its leadership, with regard to the importance of children in the church.
In true Barna-esque style he weighs and measures the problem. He looks at the trends and suggests they are alarming (41). He measures the knowledge and values that children have and comes to the conclusion that American children are not being nurtured in the faith. He says this is even more alarming when you understand that most people come to their Christian faith in their childhood.
In a very moving chapter entitled “Why kids matter” he points out that, first of all, they matter to God. They are his gifts to us. Even more importantly, because they matter, He has given clear instruction to parents and the community at large as to the importance of nurture. I would add that we see this most intimately in Jesus’ relationship with children.
Barna also states that children are the battlefront of the spiritual warfare. The battle for the hearts and minds of children is where spiritual warfare is the hottest! He suggests that the more we invest in training, teaching, modelling, encouraging and etc. at this time the less we will have to pick up the pieces in the future.
Part 2 – soon. I hope!
Categories: Children, christian, christian education, Christianity, Church, community, Ethics, Faith, Family, Reflections
Tags: Christian, Christian Education, Christianity, Devotion, Faith, family
1 Comment
The Seven Up Series
The “7 Up” series is often described as the best documentary ever made. Starting with a one off program in 1964 it explored the future of British society through the lives of a group of 7 year old children.
Seven years later Michael Apted, who had been a researcher on the original program revisted the young people and continued exploring the direction of their lives. Last year 56 Up was released. Apted had returned to their lives with a film crew every 7 years for nearly 50 years.
I have always admired these people as they have had their lives audited and scrutinised by Apted and then the viewer. Yet because of their sacrifice in this process we have a record of changes, large and small, in British society over a 50 year period. From the class system, attitudes to marriage and children, through to the rise of technology and the changes in fashion, have all been recorded – both consciously and unconsciously. Their lives, and in some real sense, our Western lives have been etched into history.
As a teacher I have used this resource in a variety of ways. The series chronicles human decisions, character, history and society. However I have always been conscious that we are dealing with the lives of real people and that these lives have been filtered through the interviewing and editing by Michael Apted and his team. Whenever I use this series I remind my students to be respectful because the people are not Hollywood creations but fellow human beings with strengths and weaknesses, hopes and fears just like the rest of us.
I have never been disappointed by my classes responses. Yes they may like one person more than another but we have that in life anyway. It also wonderful to see how students respond to decisions that the participants make and modify their views and responses. I will relate some of these in the future.
I admire all the people in this project simply because of their courage and openness. When we see their lives we get a glimpse of our own.
I hope to write more in the days ahead.
Categories: Education, Family, people i admire, Reflections, Teaching, Uncategorized
Tags: 7 up, 7 Up Series, Education, family, Michael Apted
5 Comments
The Simple Life
Recently I reflected on my parents camping over 60 years ago. They traveled around Holland and Belgium by tandem bike. Yet I am still amazed, when I go on holidays, and I see the amazing rigs that people take with them.
I remember being on the way to the Grand Canyon on Martin Luther King Day in 2003. We encountered hundreds of “Snowbirds” driving their huge, coach sized RVs from the north, heading towards the 
warmer climes in the south towing the family car or truck behind them. No comfort was spared on the trip. On one evening, camped at Lake Havasu (the town in Arizona that has London Bridge straddle part of its man made lake) we had our little 3 man tent surrounded by RVs and campers. Sadly I don’t have a photo of that but it looked very ironic. What I found sad is that people don’t even leave their motor-homes. All they do is relocate their isolation! To me that defeats the purpose of venturing out into the world.
I would like to argue that camping should be a simple exercise – getting close to nature and other people. The fewer encumbrances the better. My wife and I don’t use a tandem but we try and get some long hikes into our camping schedule. As far as equipment is concerned, if it doesn’t fit into the VW Golf it doesn’t come.
I feel blessed that I have a “cheap” wife. I must explain. A friend couldn’t go camping unless all the mod cons came with them. He had to buy a very expensive caravan and a 4WD to tow it. My wife is happy with fewer comforts than I am. That is why I am blessed. A tent, a stove, a small table and two chairs and we have our home away from home, and when we hike we leave the furniture behind.
Unusual Grace – A Dead Man’s Boots
My dad and fellow workers in WW2. Dad is top left.
I have reflected previously on some of my father’s experiences as a conscripted worker in Germany during WW2. (See here) Dutch workers had more freedom than others as the German authorities simply said, “If you abscond we will pick up your father to take your place.”
My father worked north of Berlin in a place called Hennigsdorf on the Havel river. In 1945 he and his fellow workers were liberated by the advancing Soviet armies. The workers found themselves in the midst of extremely harrowing battles as the German army made its last ditch stand.
One of the few detailed stories my dad told me about this part of his life centred on this liberation. By 1945 his clothes, and in particular shoes, were in a state of extreme deterioration. One of the liberating soldiers motioned (language being a useless option!) to my father that he should find a German soldier’s corpse with the right boot size and “liberate” them for his own use. I gather there were quite a few and they all wore high quality boots. But even after years of war my dad was still squeamish about such matters. The Russian soldier, seeing my dad’s reluctance, took off his own boots gave them to my dad and then went in search for an appropriately sized and equipped corpse.
Yes, it is a strange story, yet I have always seen it as an act of unusual, but real, grace. This was one of only a very few experiences that my father ever shared with me about that time of his life. The grace shown in the midst of horror was a memory he could share.
Categories: Family, History, my dad, Reflections, Uncategorized
Tags: dad, dead man's boots, family, father, Germany, Hennigsdorf, ww2
7 Comments
Three Times Thirteen
May 11th, Our 39th Wedding Anniversary …
and I remembered!
Three times thirteen
has no ‘bad luck’ attached
but rather,
showers of providence.
God’s provision and care,
His ‘third strand’
of presence, love
and grace
that kept us
through thick and thin,
sickness and health,
poverty and well …
I joke
that marriage is an institution.
This institution
I am grateful to have entered
with my own free will,
sound mind,
and no regrets.
May we share more,
memories,
experiences,
walks
and the odd game of “Ticket to Ride”
in the time ahead that
God gives.
Categories: Family, Poem, poetry, Uncategorized
Tags: family, Marriage, Poem, Poem on Sunday, poems
7 Comments
Equipping The Troops – a Christian Apologetic Approach
If the Laissez faire is foolish and the Fortress method only temporary, how do we prepare our children for a life of Christian faith that can withstand the arguments and abuse that will certainly come.
Let me begin by saying, if one believes that Scripture is the Word of God and that the Holy Spirit is real and that God’s promises are true then there is no reason to be fearful. Too often however, I have seen parenting that is driven by fear – fear of the world and its myriad dangers.
From an early age, starting with Children’s Bibles, teach the truth as the Bible presents it.
(The Bible in Pictures for Little Eyes by Kenneth Taylor is a classic in this area). Do this daily, whether at the meal table or bedtime. And pray regularly. As the children grow, so must the sophistication of the stories and the discussion. Bible knowledge is the bedrock from which we defend our faith. Memorising stories and verses become essential tools for the future.
Knowing the overarching story of Scripture with the centrality of the promised Christ in the Old Testament and his arrival in the New will protect them from seeing Scripture as a mere set of moral rules. As our children grow older they discover that the Bible is presenting an image of a Kingdom that has come in Christ and will be completely revealed with his return. They need a picture of eternity and the relationship of our earthly pilgrimage to it.
I could say so much more about this but I think you get the drift. Our children need to be seeped in knowledge AND in understanding. They need to understand the uniqueness of the faith. Critically, they also need to know that God has created them for a purpose in His kingdom, both now and forever.
So where do other faiths come in? Don’t major on minors. What are the predominant counter Christian worldviews today? What do people believe? What motivates the lives of people? What dominant values does the media portray? How is Christianity distinctive from these views?
To understand these motivations is to know where Christianity differs. What are the logical outcomes of these “faiths”? E.g. If we are simply the product of evolution how does that affect our value as humans? How does this contrast with being a child of God? And what about faiths that demand we earn our salvation? What does that reveal about their view of sin and how does that match up with the Christian concept of Grace?
Finally, as parents we need to model a genuine Christian life where our words and actions, choices and views are shaped by our faith. Our children need to see us talking with God and studying His word. Our children need to see that our lives are not lived out of custom and superstition but out of a living relationship.
Is this a guarantee. No. Ultimately our children will need to make choices of their own. But if you hearken back to Prov 22:6,(see: A Scary Verse) the principle is that if we set the foundations of faith the likelihood of straying will be greatly reduced.
Categories: Child Theology, christian, christian education, Christianity, Devotional, Faith, Family, Reflections, Uncategorized
Tags: Christian, Christian Education, Christianity, Devotion, Faith, family
4 Comments
Travels from Ur 