Family

Family

I was trying to think of something positive to write about. Burglary and house fires – no. An eye for an eye – no again. Family -yes. It is one of my favourite topics. Even students at school get sick of my “family” stories.

cousins 1Briefly, there are two family anecdotes I want to highlight:

A while ago, and again recently (The Providence of God), I reflected on how my wife’s parents met. A few days ago their grandchildren had a reunion. Although my wife’s father has been dead for nearly 50 years, I am sure sure he would have been proud of the brood that gathered – fine young (and some less so!) people all of them. Their grandmother, who died more recently, was able to tell them how proud she was of them. The cousins had a great time remembering and celebrating the bonds they have.

My second story relates to the burglary and house fire two of my daughters had recently. (Which I am not going into!) What impressed me as a dad was how the sisters and lone brother in law went into action to help. Some cleaned, some made meals, others carried and fetched (over long distances) and each person’s shoulder was a available to lean and cry on. As a dad, it chokes me up to see the family at work like this. It is another reason for which to thank God!

So once again, I am compelled to proclaim how important family is. It is a jewel to protect, nurture and celebrate. I know for some readers your experience differs. If you have a young family, make an effort to set a foundation in which mutual care and love is a key guiding principle. In the future times will come when these bonds will be extremely important. So build them when they are young.

Categories: christian, Christianity, Devotional, Faith, Family, Reflections, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , | 2 Comments

A Reminder to Myself from a Previous Post

This is a reminder to me to be aware of what I post as I may be called to live it out!

This is a reminder to me to be aware of what I post as I may be called to live it out!

 

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Finally! A Moment.

I have finally found a moment to stop and reflect. The last few days have been spent sorting through charred remains and retrieving anything worthwhile or important. The emotions have been going through the “Elizabeth Kubler Ross cycle”. And then, some of us are starting to smell like walking fire victims!

As an exercise it reveals a lot about yourself. As we go through the rubble, the TV, fridge, washing machine or camera mean very little. The treadmill was a little more difficult because my daughter remembers the hours it took to put the thing together. But the tears flow for the lost memories of baby clothes, a cross stitch from a departed oma, cards and presents from students, toys kept for thirty years and so on – of no value to anyone but the owner. On the bedroom door of one daughter were charred quotes and passages from Scripture which all seemed very apt – that left a lump in our throats. Yes, God “will help us through the difficult times”.

Just as with a physical assault victim, this assault, although not directly physical on a person, is still real and will take time to heal. All the documents, passports, certificates, tax information will need to be replaced. This takes time. The cost is enormous: the emotional cost – trusting people, and the physical cost – for days now and for days in the future friends and family will be cleaning, scrubbing, replacing and moving things from one city to another, and then back again when a new house is found. Just to this point we have spent well over 100 man hours, and we are nowhere near the end.  I haven’t included house hunting, police interviews and time on the telephone changing details and etc.

For me, as a dad, I am praying desperately not to become bitter and vengeful. This is of no help to anyone. Constantly I am seeking God’s grace and being reminded how forgiving He was of me. That is a humbling reminder. Sanctification, daily being made into Jesus, is an ongoing process. God is having to work quite hard on me just at this moment. Then again, He has had to that on many other occasions.

Categories: Family, Reflections, Uncategorized | 2 Comments

Ending One Year and Starting the Next

Due to recent events piled on others that have occurred this year and the consequent numbness of heart and mind, I was looking through my photos of 2012 searching for one that encapsulated the year. I came across a photo that I had used in a blog on an earlier occasion in the post: “The Providence of God.”

In this blog I reflected on how my wife’s parents met. Out of two struggling lives God created a loving family in a distant land. The place in this photo is the rest home with its message written in the lives of my wife and her sisters.

At this moment that photo summarises my thoughts: through our pains and struggles God can accomplish much. The darkness of the moment will be removed with the glory that is to come.

Picture 563

“De Hezenberg” near Hattem and Zwolle in the Netherlands.

Categories: christian, Christianity, Devotional, Faith, Family, Reflections | Tags: , , , , , | 4 Comments

Thank You

First of all, thank you for all your kind words, thoughts and prayers. That has been a real strength and support. We are all still a little numb this morning. My wife is in the kitchen scrubbing retrieved treasures with sugar soap, so that acrid smell is still in the air – even in our home

It was a weird sensation sitting in the car yesterday and being helpless as emergency services and police swarmed the site. That was when I wrote the post – my form of therapy. What takes an hour in a TV police show took 12 hours. And my wife and I were still at the site at 10:30pm waiting for the shutter people to secure the house before we could begin the 1 and half hour journey home. We had sent the girls back to our home earlier in the day after they had been escorted through the remnants of the house by the fire department.

Today we are going to have a big family prayer time. This had been planned but now has a greater sense of urgency and purpose. It will also be a time of thanksgiving.

One final comment. Whereas I wanted to get the perpetrators and smack their heads together, one of my daughters wanted to pray for them. That was quite humbling for me. Thanks again for your thoughts and prayers. God is more than good. God is sovereign!

Categories: Family, Prayer, Reflections | Tags: , | 9 Comments

What can I say?

I had intended to reflect further on the people I saw at the cricket match. Then, this morning I received a call from one of my daughters. She reported that the house she and her sister shared had been burgled and set alight.

Two rooms in particular were gutted, and everything else was extensively smoke damaged and the building has been structurally compromised due to the fire getting into the ceiling.

So many emotions went through my mind: anger, sorrow and incredulity were just some. We are not a materialistic family but the material things that mean most are those with a sentimental attachment: a grandmother’s cross stitch, a gift from a special friend, an art work by a student and so on. All this is now irretrievably damaged.

I don’t wish to comment on the perpetrators but I do want to reflect on a number of things.

The cost: so far I have seen, firemen, police, detectives, fire investigators and forensic investigators invest many hours and it is only 6 hours since the fire. Apart from the emotional cost to my family, the social cost is enormous. We haven’t even started with insurance assessors, and the whole relocation and replacement effort that my daughters will now have to face. There were the ten years of educational resources that one daughter had accumulated. This was all at home because she was changing schools over this term break. As she says, it is now in her head. There was the precious doll that had survived in immaculate condition for 29 years but is now destroyed.

As a dad I was proud of the ways my girls handled it. They focused on what was important, thanked God that He is still sovereign and proceeded to deal with the issues before them.

Also as a dad you realise that you can’t protect your kids from the realities of the world. All you can do is teach and show your children what is truly important – eternally important. At that level they have not lost a thing. If anything they have gained.

But the incident is still fresh. I even get emotional just writing about it. In the future I will reflect again, when I am a bit calmer.

Categories: Family, Reflections | 23 Comments

Early one morning

It is going to be a hot day today so I got up early and watered the garden. The air was still and the neighbourhood very quiet. The only thing spoiling the serenity was my own water pump whirring away.

When I got back inside the family, including those who have flown or driven in for Christmas, were still asleep – or pretending to be.

I started counting my blessings – big and small. We can often be so obsessed with money and material things, but there are so many small things, or should I say “non material” things to be thankful for: a family that enjoys coming home, their love for each other, the banter and retelling of their lives, family jokes and gentle teasing … God is good!

Dear God, thank you for slowing me down and reminding me what us truly precious.

Categories: christian, Christianity, Devotional, Faith, Family, Reflections | 5 Comments

Christmas Greetings

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Time Passes

This year has given me a real sense of time passing. It has reminded me of the frailty of humanity and the relentless tide of generations. At the beginning of the year my mum died, three days later an uncle, my father’s youngest brother, and then mid year another of dad’s brothers and, just recently, my mother’s youngest brother. Death has been a companion all throughout 2012.

In my father’s line of the family I am now he oldest with the family name. I am not certain what that means. At least it means that a generation has nearly gone, my generation is getting older and there is another following.

For me, the loudest message must be, pass on the baton of faith in words and deeds. I fear, in places, I see the baton being dropped – or it has dropped altogether. That is exceptionally sad, especially when preceding generations have been so faithful to keep the covenant chain alive. There is no greater and lasting treasure that we can pass on to our children than a living knowledge of Jesus Christ. I know we can’t force faith on our children but we can reveal its vitality and life through our own lives and words.

Another lesson for me is to live each day. Our time this side of heaven is finite. There is no time to waste as we promote the Kingdom. There is so much to do to prepare for the king’s return!

And for ourselves, personally, we don’t know the day or the hour we will be called home so we need to be prepared for that call.

Categories: christian, Christianity, Devotional, Faith, Family, Reflections, Uncategorized | 2 Comments

The Innocents

Oh God can you forgive us?
We sacrifice our innocents
In so many ways.
We defile their youth
with adult filth
and age them before their time.
We shake their security
with adult quarrels.
And we take their lives
far before time
for the love of ” rights” and ” freedoms”.

Oh God forgive us
for the altars to Molech
we have made
to shatter young lives.

Oh God forgive us
for emulating Herod
again,
this Christmas.

Categories: christian, Christianity, Family, Poem, poetry, Prayer, Uncategorized | 4 Comments

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